August 31, 2012
A surprise entry into the 2012 presidential race was announced by America’s first independent zombie-based political party tonight at the 26th annual Dragon*Con Festival in Atlanta, Georgia, coming on the heels of the Republican National Convention and just before the 4th Annual Zombie Walk downtown. Recently unearthed political newcomer A. Zombie announced his candidacy for President of the United States, running on a platform that will promote expanded access to AMC Network’s television shows, including AMC’s “The Walking Dead” series. This announcement was spurred by the recent cancellation of all AMC programming by DISH Network. The underlying idea fueling his entry into the race is that “government programs begin with good television programming.”
In this rare opportunity to get up close and personal with a dead serious Presidential Candidate, A. Zombie addressed several hundred potential supporters, most of whom are undead. He promised to secure the viewing freedom of zombies and humans alike, noting that “a zombie who watches zombies is the zombiest zombie of them all.”
Voters in the audience from both sides of the aisle rallied behind a common idea, and seemed to appreciate the upbeat message along with the break from relentless partisan attack ads.
“This is a candidate I can get behind,” said one warm-bodied festival attendee dressed as Captain America, “I’m sick of hearing the other guys trash talking, or just spouting some platitude without anything tangible to back it up. Here’s a guy and his wife who see something wrong, they get a plan to fix it, and they do something about it.”
Undead Tinkerbell expressed similar feelings. “A. Zombie is somebody I can relate to. My boyfriend has DISH, and when they dropped AMC it totally wrecked our Friends TV Night. Here’s a candidate that cares what happens to me in my life.”
A. Zombie and his wife, Patty Morgan-Zombie, will be hosting a series of high profile events as part of their campaign tour. They will be leading the parade on Saturday, September 1st at 10 a.m. at Auburn Ave. NE and Peachtree Street NE in Atlanta. Based on the warm and cold dead reception they received tonight, they expect a big turnout for Saturday’s Official Campaign Rally which will include their campaign bus and marching band at 3:00pm at the Courtland Street entrance of the Marriott Marquis, 265 Peachtree Center Avenue NE, Atlanta.
A. Zombie is endorsed by AMC Networks, home of AMC’s “The Walking Dead.” AMC and its sister networks, WE tv, IFC and Sundance have all been dropped by DISH Network due to an unrelated lawsuit. A. Zombie’s mission is to get the word out to those who don’t have access so they can choose another cable provider in time for the next premiere of AMC’s “The Walking Dead” on October 14, 2012. For more information, please visit http://www.azombieforpresident.com/.
DISH Network, the Romney Campaign, and the Obama Campaign were unavailable for comment.